And now for something completely different......

Don't you just love it when bloggers go from "super-serious" posts to something totally frivolous??

Well, that's what I am doing.

I have a little confession to make.

I have some embarrassing, teenager-ish things I am doing (and have been doing) this week.

*sigh* Here it goes:

1. I bought both Taylor Swift CD's. And I like them.

Don't laugh.

2. I re-read the 3rd and 4th books (in 2 days no less) of the Twilight Saga, in preparation for the 3rd movie release (Eclipse) next week.

Yes, I said re-read. Like, I have read them before and they are so good I read them again. And I own them. Really.

Stop laughing.

3. I have already made plans as to exactly which day in the week next week I can get away from my children to go and see said movie.

It comes out on Wednesday. I have to wait until Saturday.

The fact that I am actually seeing the movie in theatres is a really big deal because I NEVER see movies in the theatre. Too expensive. Too many people. And I have too many little kids to get away.

However, I am making it happen here.

Wow. I feel much better putting that out there publicly. I promise to talk more about why I like Twilight so much later. 'Nother post. 'Nother day.

I have been so obsessed reading those books again I actually put down the knitting.

Seriously. What's wrong with me? But that's all done now. Back to the crack.

Playing Catch-Up

After a busy week with family, many (MANY) late nights, and zippo for sleep.....I am playing catch-up this week.

Catch up on laundry. Dishes. Food that went bad (I hate that. Don't you?) while I spent most of the week at my mom's house. Catch up on blogs (haven't read much). Catch up on my blog. Update Ravelry (ok, I did that...check my new project here). Balance the checkbook (am I the last person in the world who still writes checks?). Catch up my brain.

I feel totally lost and out of it. My body hurts from all the driving (and we won't be doing that again any time soon.....like I will put my foot down if anyone else comes to visit.....more on that later). Pregnancy and 3+ hours in a car everyday do not mesh well.

I didn't accomplish much last week. But it was fun and nice to see my aunt. I love her. I miss her sooooo much. I wish she lived closer. I would see her every week if I could. She is so great with my kids - happy just being with them, laughing with them, and watching them play. It's always amazing to me the different people that can come out of the same upbringing (same parents). She is so different from her sisters.

I will be back to bloggy soon. I have lots on my mind and I need to declutter it. I have been having fun reading a few blogs here and there the last few days on my phone. I can't wait to
"catch up" with what you've all been up to.

Random Thursday, Mostly Knitting Edition...some other stuff

I bought some yarn off a fellow raveler recently. I got a bag of Malabrigo scraps (to make scrappies of course (that's scrappy longies)), a bag of sock yarn scraps (um? baby booties, etc), and a skein of Malabrigo Sock in colorway Solis.

It arrived, and it is beautiful of course. But it smells. Bad. By bad, I mean not bad like fish or rotten eggs. I mean like heavily perfumed or febreezed (however you spell febreeze). It smells like she had some air freshener right in her yarn storage. All the yarn has this heavy, heavy scent on it. I am sure it will wash out in blocking. But it's obnoxious.

~~~~~~

I decided to wind up and knit the Malabrigo Sock yarn.

I realize now why it was discounted by this woman. The yarn is possessed. Really.

I had my husband and son help me wind. My hubby played the swift and Wobbs held the ball winder (because hubby didn't want to get out of his chair and their was no table near it to put the wonder on).

As soon as I unwrapped the skein, I could see the yarn was tangled. We carried on anyway. About 3/4 of the way through I had to grab the other end of the yarn and start untangling it back to the end that was wound up. It took us an hour.

Then, since the skein looked pretty bad I thought I would rewind it. I've done this with other skeins. No biggie. Just set the skein down, pull the middle out, and start winding it again. Right??

Wrong.

The skein FLEW OFF THE BALL WINDER. Twice. Now I had 3 little saggy balls of yarn connected by strings to one another, with tangles, again.

An hour later all was well. I started a pair of socks. I hope they do not start on fire while I am wearing them. I think I will block them in Holy Water.

~~~~~~

I am using my 9 inch circular needles for the socks. So far so good. Let's see if they cramp up my hands or if I like them after 6 inches of knitting 3x3 rib.

~~~~~~

Crocheted Baby Blanket is finished. I had just enough yarn to finish it. It was promptly picked up by my 3 year old daughter and wrapped around one of her babies. Problem solved.

~~~~~~

While I was at a friend's house yesterday my husband moved the twin bed from the kids' room into our room. Yes!! Finally. I have been bugging him to do this forever. My daughter slept in her own bed (in my room, but whatever) last night. Woo Hoo!! My 1 year old boy slept there too for about 1/2 the night. Pretty good. It was at least long enough that my husband and I were able to enjoy some "quality time" alone, in our own bed. Good enough for me!

I do have to admit, it was weird having all that space in the bed. I am sure I'll get used to it just in time for the arrival of my new baby. (And I missed my little boy! I am glad he came over later.)

~~~~~~

I loved all the comments on the movie reviews. I don't know if I'll be doing any more in the future. Those two movies were just on my mind to say something about, don't know why.

~~~~~~

Will Steve just get back from college already so that we don't have to deal with Joe anymore?? Really. Can't stand Joe.

~~~~~~

And, the best news EVER! Look what I got in the mail from EatSleepKnit:


It's all Malabrigo! I got 2 skeins of Cactus Flower (lighter pink in the picture, although it is by no means light, it's very vibrant pink!), 3 skeins of Purple Mystery, which is a wonderful jewel-tone purple, and 6 skeins of Geranio, the really deep toned pink in the picture. I love them all and they coordinate beautifully with each other.

Plans are for longies, a sweater, a couple of hats, and misc. baby items with this yarn. I may also squeeze out a toddler sweater of the Geranio for my (big) little girl. I can't wait to knit with this yarn. I wound up 2 of the Geranio, 2 Purple Mystery, and 1 Cactus Flower yesterday at a friend's house. No possessed yarn here (and it doesn't smell!!).

Random Thursday

Sorry for the short hiatus. It happens.

~~~

Since I last posted a "Random Thursday", I have been paying attention to how often I get to shower. Apparently, Thursday is the day. As in, I get to shower once a week. Seems to be this day of the week. I am kind of ok with that. Ok, not really. But it is what it is.

~~~

Did you know that Apple does not allow "unauthorized apps" on their products like the iPhone, iPod Touch, and iPad?? (I will add here that I don't own any of these....but because of the following information, I may consider Apple products in the future.) What does this mean for you? It means that Steve Jobs, the Apple CEO/Runs the show/Inventor dude does not allow applications to be downloaded to his products that are not authorized by his company.

Do you want to know what he is specifically blocking? Of course you do. He does not allow applications that allow downloading of pornography on his products. Really. This is awesome. I wish more companies thought like this and did something like this.

Thank You Steve Jobs!!

You can read more here.

H/T to Become What You Are

~~~

Thank you to all the bloggers who stopped by and got their Sunshine Award and also stayed around to read a few posts and leave comments. It's always nice to know someone is reading.

~~~

I am hoping to get around to updating my sidebar with some currents photos of the family, a link to a post (to be written) that tells a little more about me, and an updated list of blogs I read.

I currently have the blogs into a few categories: Bat Shit Crazy, Catholic, Knitting, Man Blogs, Recipes, and Keeping Me Sane. I realize now that I have organized them on my phone that I have about 50 I am reading quite regularly.

~~~

Do you want to hear about my tattoos? Would that be a weird post? Would it be interesting? Does it make a difference if I feel differently about a lot of them than I did at the time I got them?

I am going to tell you one cute thing about one of them. I have a sleeve consisting of faeries. (Yes, I like to spell "fairy" weird. Shoot me.) A few of them are in the buff (with wings). My 3 year old daughter pointed to one of them the other day and said, "She needs a pretty dress." Ha!

~~~

I have been working of finishing my WIPs. That's Works-In-Progress. It's a knitting acronym. I finished one today and I have two more: this shawl and this sweater.

I am trying to decide if I should finish them before I start anything else, or just move on and make the fun baby projects I want to start???

I also am itching to knit another pair of socks.

~~~

I have been seriously considering having an ultrasound to see if we can see what gender this baby is. This is the first time I have ever thought of doing this. I have never cared nor wanted to know the gender of my babies before they are born. I really like the surprise at birth. It gives me something to push for.

You want to know what is motivating me to find out? You do? Knitting. Yep. Crack is making me want to know what gender child we have conceived. Because? Well, because if I know what I am having I can knit accordingly. I can go ahead and knit those purple longies with rainbow trim if it's a girl. I can duplicate stitch a dinosaur on the back of that sweater if I know it's a boy.

My son suggests I just knit boy and girl things and save the wrong ones for another baby...."because you'll probably have like 10 more Ma." Uh-huh.

It's a lot of work to put in. I'd like to know what I am working for. Do I have a problem? Should I do it?

Was it somethibg I said?

I have a neat little stat counter at the bottom of the screen. I get an email once a week from "site-meter" giving me numbers on blog visits (and details if I want them).

My average weekly visits have been about 40, or roughly 6 per day.

Week before last; 5 total. Less than 1 per day.

This week: 1 visit.

Must be my charm.

Day 2 and 3 ReCap:

It's Day 4, I know.

Day 2, entitled "Wobbers Turns Ten", or "How to Survive a Decade":

Sleep Fail.
Mommy Fail.
Patience Fail.

No one was happier than me when that day was over. Of course, I still wasn't very happy when Day 3 started.

Day 2 began by my children decided 7 am was proper wake up time (after months, months I tell you, of 9-10 am wake ups) and ended after midnight with no nap for mama. Daylight savings time - Curse You!!

Day 3:

7 am. Wake up again. Ten year old Saint takes babies to basement for movie. Mama sleeps for another hour.

Nice playdate at friend's house. Discuss sleep issues, of which she's had her fair share. Feel less like a "Fail".

Decide, with her help, that if kids are going to get up at 7 they can go to bed at 7 too.

End up with one asleep by 7:15, the other just after 8.

Day 4:

Things looking up. Babies sleep till 8. Flower throws up in bed, I think just from coughing too hard with a dry throat. Day moves on.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Now, I just wish my husband was home. I need to clean and the motivation level is low.

I am also going to make a plea to you fellow bloggers/readers:

Anybody out there got Blue's Clues tapes, specifically "Blue's Birthday" and "Magenta Comes Over" and a long lost Blue Christmas special where Steve sings about snowing??

Our tapes broke (our broken old VCR ate them, so we got a new VCR but the tapes are bye-bye) and it has been a sad time without them. I'd pay ya for shipping if you had one you'd be willing to give us.

:)

Yarn Whore

I have an incurable need for knitting. And talking about knitting. And writing about knitting. And thinking about knitting. And dreaming about knitting (yes, I dream about knitting, usually when there is a complicated pattern I need to work out). And blogging about knitting.

Do I need a blog devoted just to knitting? Am I boring my dear, non-knitting readers every time I talk about yarn, gauge, yarn, needles, and yarn? Do you feel like it just doesn't pertain? Is it distracting you from my Catholic, stay-at-home-mom, catching-catching-babies-on-the-side, pro-life, hate Obama, new conversion, Harry Potter loving blog?

Is it too early to be exicited...

...for the next Harry Potter film?

I just finished watching my very own copy of Half Blood Prince (the most awesomest Christmas present in the world! Thanks Ma!). On the "extras" disc is a sneak peak at Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Parts 1 &2. They come out Nov 2010 and July 2011 respectively.

I almost peed my pants with glee and am full of so much anticipation I feel like I used to before my secular Christmases as a kid. Hee hee!

Did I mentiom that the only 2 movies I have bothered to see in the last 4 years of baby-rearing are HP V and HP VI? Yep. I am a HP geek.

Now if I can just get my Griffondor House Emblem bag and Griffondor Quidditch sweater knit before the next movie...

Dear Advent,

I am so sorry. I tried. Really, I did. I tried so hard to get into you and the Joyful Anticipation of Our Lord this year.

I know I did a much better job last year. I put up the Jesse Tree to celebrate Christ's lineage from the beginning of time and actually read the readings with the children. I decorated my house. I dressed my children appropriately in liturgical colors for each Sunday Mass.

I scourged the internet and YouTube for messages to share with my bloggy readers about the wonderful coming of Our Savior. I sung "O Come Emmanuel" so much that my husband asked me to stop. I pondered the Mystery that He is, both in the silent places of my heart and in this public venue with my peers.

Advent, you have been a wonderful companion to me in years past. I have no reason to abandon you. And yet, I have.

It doesn't help that we were *asked not to come to Mass* (twice). Or that I had to learn the hard way that being a Catholic homeschooler does not automatically make someone a decent person.

Not having regular internet access makes those wonderful renditions of Advent music so needed here on this blog a thing of the past.

Having to ask *my mother* for money to bail us out of a financial pinch is the icing on the cake this year. (Not to mention that she also made Christmas real for our kids this year - Thanks Ma!).

Nary is there a Christmas Tree shining it's lights in my home. Those candy canes purchased for decoration and Reindeer-making crafts are still lumped up in a plastic Walmart bag awaiting their shining moment.

No Advent, I have not been joyful or welcoming to you this year. Perhaps if I had embraced your spirit I would rightfully feel more "Christmassy" about now.

Today is Christmas Eve. There is one day left for me to redeem myself with you. I fear you will have to simply be patient and wait for me again next year.

I bid you farewell. Until we meet again...I'll enjoy our last hours together as I find a place to sit at Midnight Mass.

~H.A.M.

Something only a Knitter would notice...

I have seen Disney's "Lady and the Tramp" at least 100 times (probably more) in my life. Lady and the Tramp and Cindella are my favorite Disney flicks.

My Flower recently discovered Cinderella. We have watched it no less than 6 times per day for about a month. She loves her "Cinna-relly".

A few days ago the unthinkable happened - we lost Cinnarelly. We moved every piece of furniture, every toy, every cup, bowl and spoon, tearing the house apart for this movie. Gone.

So I did what any sane parent would do, I cried. Then I picked up "the puppy movie" and introduced her to Lady. She loves her Lady, but covers her eyes at the scary rat.

Seeing this movie now, as a knitter, I notice things in more detail than before. Darling, the "mom", is knitting some baby items. But not only is she shown reclining in a rocker, needles and yarn in hand - she is knitting with DOUBLE POINT NEEDLES.

The first time I saw a sock in progress on a set of DPNs, I told myself, "Now that is why I can't knit. Look at how complicated that is." I never imagined I'd actually *enjoy* working on them or ever understand how they work.

Needless to say, I thought it was rather spiffy the attention to detail in the movie. Pretty neat.

Some Random Facts

Am update post - because you deserve one and my mind needs to declutter.

~~1

The monster child rapist choose to NOT take the plea the DA gave him and see how his luck fares in a jury trial. What an idiot. What is he going to do? Get up there and say, "Well, she never said no." Duh. She's 13. She can't consent even if she wanted to (which she didn't).

~~2

Said daughter above has told us (on her own) that she wants to live with us and not her mother. Score one for us. Now to get it sorted out in court......

~~3

I have recently lost a very close friend and am morning the relationship I thought we had. (See previous post on mean girls). At the first test of our friendship, she dropped me like 3rd period French. Her ability to "not trust me" is because some important people in our homeschool group found out she was being nice to me. Really.

~~4

Crack.

What can I say? I have a LOT of this stuff. I recently organized my crack. I organized it by cost and weight, where and when I bought it, what I plan to do with it, and what it's cut with.

Yes folks, I cannot get any lower.

~~5

Speaking of crack, my husband's sweater is officially half done. I wish I had photos to put up, but I forgot to bring my scandisk with to my friend's house. (Thank you, laurazim, for your wi-fi). I have finished a sleeve and I am over half way up the body. Soon, he will be warm.

~~6

There is so much more crack to play with, my brain is swarming day and knit, I mean night, with projects I want to complete. Right now I have enough yarn for no less than 13 projects, many of which already have names (even though they are just balls or hanks of yarn): Socks for me (wool, cashmere, nylon), socks for a friend (superwash wool), my sweater (malabrigo wool), my mittens and scarf (silky wool yarn, yum!!), hubby sweater (on the needles, cascade 220), fair-isle mittens (alpaca blend), woolies for babies (pants, sweaters, hats), the never-ending shawl (alpaca lace), a mantilla (leftover alpaca lace), bunnies (cute pattern for a toy)......the list goes on.

I also have acquired a pretty good library of crack-related books. I have been checking them out from the public library and then deciding which ones to buy. Not that there is any money for book buying, so I just keep checking them out over and over again. Hee hee.

~~7

We need a cellular modem. Any suggestions? We currently have US Cellular for a provider.

~~8

Do I write a letter to the mean girl, or not? There is a ton of stuff I want to say and clarify, but I don't feel like I owe her the time of day. Email is out of the question (that's how this mess started) and I don't feel like talking to her. Do I really let someone, ONE person, keep me from participating in a group my kids enjoy. I jst know I won't be able to keep up a fake facade (acting like everything is OK) when/if I see her again. I am pretty blunt.

~~9

Speaking of blunt. My husband likes that I am blunt. So do my two close (non-mean) girl friends. What do you think about bluntness? With me, you get what you see. If you want to know how I feel about something, just ask. I won't sugar coat it - don't have time. I won't say something nice just to make you feel good (unless you're my baby girl and you think you look pretty with a yellow sock, a red sock, green pants, and an ugly brown tank top - then I'll lie through my teeth).

~~10

That's all. Oh, I lied. Only one person requested a hand made Pay it Forward gift. That wonderful lady will be receiving a pair of hand knit socks. :)

In which mean girls exist beyond junior high

Yes. That's right. You can be almost 30 (I am almost 30) and still have Mean Girls around every corner.

Recently, this was brought to my attention in a rather unexpected way. I had forgotten all about "girl world". I had lived through all sorts of hard stuff in my personal life, my marriage, my friendships.

But I never thought a group of homeschooling women would be a threat.

I was wrong.

It's been over a week, and I am still bothered enough that I steam through a shower thinking of the things I would like to say to this woman's face if I ever bother to see it again.

Women are mean. In particular, you can think that you have a very close, secure, and loyal friendship only to find out that it is shallow and meaningless at best.

The details are too much to hash out, although I know some of you would be darned interested in hearing them. If I could muster the strength at this point, I would.

I managed to "turn the other cheek" for an entire week before I blew up at the leadership team of this particular homeschool group. And when I say blew up - I mean it. Verbal vomit. I didn't swear, but I think that's just because it's not as much fun to do that through email (which was how they contacted me).

I am not a fan of email for important communications. It's a very passive-aggressive way of communicating that allows people to combine words and tone that would never happen in real life: "We are so sorry if you're offended. We are not singling you out. We love you. By the way, don't come to Mass. Have a wonderful Christmas!!"

Really?! Can we be a little more 5th grade?

Ugh.

Well, I promise things should be shaping up here around the new year. I am looking into getting a modem for my laptop from my cell phone company. That should spiff things up and get me back to blogging.

For now......you just get random, when I have time kinda stuff.

Sorry.

Blog, Interrupted

"You are not currently connected to any network."

My computer triumphantly tells me this everytime I log on.

Why not just say:

"You're unconnected."
"You have been disconnected from the outside world."
"Don't even think about rejoining society any time soon."
"No one wants to connect with you."

Ok, that last one is a little bit of my own insecurities shining through.

Still.

I am unconnected. I sit and type with my thumbs and it's not the same. I have looked into satellite internet. Expensive. I miss my DSL. Dial up would make me cry and render everything unreachable and obsolete.

Not to mention that aside from missing my blogging, many other extreme, stressful situations require my attention at this time.

If anyone is still reading this, please pray for healing, spiritually and emotionally, for my daughters. And, as always, continued conversion of my husband's heart. (Yes, I realize that wasn't a complete sentence. Yes, I homeschool. Scary, I know.)

-H

Testing, Testing

Ok, so we have moved. We have no internet access because I now live in the boonies - way, way out in the boonies.

I am typing this post on my Crackberry (it's really a Blackberry, but it's like a drug, hence the crack). It has taken me a while to figure this thing out and this is my test post, typed with my thumbs on a keyboard no bigger than a bus pass.

I am still living, as Candy has so elequantly put it (although I can't figure out how to link to her on this thing), in Cardboard Stonehedge. It's a little depressing. Still, I hope to grow to love this house and the land.

I still hate bugs, a lot. But it was awesome to see a whole flock (if that's the right term) of turkeys out in the field we own this morning while I nursed my youngest.

Oh, and his birthday is tomorrow. Lovey will be one. He's atill such a baby but growing so much too and almost walking.

:)

Wish List

For family far away, or even close by friends or family, I am posting a wish list for the two upcoming birthdays....Lovey turns 1 next month and Flower will be 3.

I like to do Montessori Activities with them, especially Flower. Mostly, I go to the thrift or secondhand store and pick up things and make activities that are similar to the ones I see on different Montessori teacher websites. I have a lot of stuff that I've gotten from there. But still, there are some classic Montessori activities I'd like to have for them that I can't buy at a store around here and can only find online and I can't afford to buy on my own.

For example, I think Flower would love more sensorial activities. She loves to sort and stack things and especially touch them and organize them. I think she would love to have the Pink Tower and/or Brown Stairs. There are a couple of different stores you can get them at online, just click one of these colored links in this post. I know they may seem like just a bunch of blocks, but they are designed to help them with visual discrimination....which Flower has a high sensitivity to already. I think she'll love the "order" without chaos of playing with these two toys.

I also like the Movable Alphabet. I'd like to start her with the D'Nealian letters so that it's not hard for her to make the jump from recognizing and writing manuscript to cursive. Then there's the Number Rods. Again, visual discrimination but this time with a math approach.

For Lovey...I really like the Circle Sorter. It's the easiest puzzle to do because it doesn't matter what direction you turn the circle, it always will fit.

Love the Farm Puzzle for both of them. And this. And the Color Tablets. Flower would love to sort these out. For. Hours.

Both of the websites have the classic Montessori items like the Pink Tower, Brown Stairs, the Number Rods, and the Color Tablets. Those are the real hardships for me to get for them right now and would be my priorities based on what I am seeing as far as readiness to learn right now. Remember, I'm also getting them ready for eventual homeschooling. I'd love to be able to start them out with this stuff.

This is just a "wish list". Being that we have 5 children, we really already have most of your classic 3 and 1 year old boy/girl presents. We have dolls and dress-up stuff, cars and blocks. We have balls and stuffed animals, and toys that make noise (see previous post). We have movies, and books, and toys to ride on. We have so much "stuff", I'd just rather see something that is needed and will be fun for them and useful (even if we have more kids).

Flower does NOT need anymore clothes, no matter how cute they are. She has at least 20 dresses and lots of shirts and pants. I love garage sales. Lovey could get more shorts....but I can garage sale those too 'cause he's just going to get them messy. :)

I realize this is not a normal-type post. But it is important to get this stuff out there, and I know so of you family types are readying this.

We love you and miss you and hope to see you soon.

Updates Coming

This isn't really a post, per se. It's a little reminder to myself, and a little "trailer", so to speak, for you. I have many posts swimming around in my brain. They are all equally important and amusing.....I just am out of time right now.

So, posts to come. Not nescessarily in this order or with these titles - but in the company of the subject at hand:

Amish Baby Hospital Stay
Crash and Burn
Baseball Explosion
Dishcloth Cotton
Strawberry Fields
Goopy Eyes
God Will Provide/I Love the IRS
Sociopath Adventures
School Musings
Veggie Tales Lovey
Aquanetta strikes again
The Heat

Stay tuned......

New Kid on the Block

Check out my friend Fr. Brian over at Scriptura et Ecclesia.

He doesn't post often, but he's got good stuff. And he likes to say, "Dude."

~H

Tickle Me

Jennit over at One Thing is having a Very Funny contest to win the coveted "You Tickle Me" award. Ok, I'll bite. Here's her poll questions with my answers:


1. Who can make you laugh the hardest (someone you personally know)?

My friend Justin, whom I haven't seen in almost 4 years. The first time my husband and I met him he had us peeing our pants. Really.

2. Who has the most contagious laugh (of those you know personally)? Gotta be My Lovey (see sidebar)

3. What is the funniest movie you’ve ever seen?

Hmmm. You're making me think real hard. That's not so easy after you've had some kids. Boondock Saints. "....some huge freakin' guy cereal crushed him..." Hahahahahahaha!!!

4. Who is your favorite comedian?

Jeff Dunham. Hands down. Try not to laugh. I dare you.



5. What’s the funniest cartoon you’ve ever seen?

Animaniacs. Pinky & The Brain.



6. What’s your favorite comic strip?

Garfield. Duh. (I used to have a Garfield tattoo. My very first professional tattoo that I got when I was 16. Unfortunately, it was sacrificed when I decided to get my sleeve.)

I cannot find a copy of the strip I'd like to paste here. But I do remember it. Jon gets a call from a woman who dialed a wrong number and asks here if she'd like to turn it into a "right number" and go on a date with him. And she says yes! Turns out Bertha is a little overweight. Jon tries to think of something nice to say and finally says, "My, your teeth are round." She replies, "I eat a lot." Garfield says/thinks, "You don't say."

Hee hee.

7. What’s your favorite joke?

If I put that on my blog, I will lose readers. :) It has something to do with a bad way to spend Easter.

8. Here’s a link to something that will make you laugh: You betcha.

9. What was the last thing you laughed at so hard you cried?

Flower. She had filled her pants with some rather potent poo. I layed her down and pulled off her pants. As I opened her diaper I asked her, "Did you poop?" She replied, "Holy Crap!" This is when I realized that maybe I had used this phrase a little too often when changing her.

My husband and two sons were also on my bed at the time (where I was changing her). I looked over and my husband had actually picked up a wipe and put it over his nose so that he wouldn't smell the poo. I am actually laughing right now just thinking of him laying there with his face all caboogled up and contorted.

Reminds me of this:



Which also made me cry and still does everytime I see it!!

10. Got a funny photo? Show me!

God Will Provide

I am passing this award to God Will Provide. If you haven't read it yet, you should. Her blog is lovely, full of pretty pictures of her babe, yummy recipes, beautiful stories, and instightful prose.

~H

Put It Away

Why is this phrase so hard to understand?

When I see the deer in the headlights look in my childrens' eyes when I utter this verbiage I wonder if maybe, somewhere, back in their developing minds an idiot savant is reasonably questioning me thinking, "Where is this unreachable place, Away, that you speak of?"

Sometimes, I just want to ram their heads prop open their eyeballs ask them how they can possible live here and still not know where Away is.

From Dictionary.com: (28th definition for "put" under verb phrases)

put away - to put in the designated place for storage

I am going to print signs in the largest font an 8x11 can handle, laminate them, and place them on every wall in the house:

PUT AWAY = PUT IN THE DESIGNATED PLACE FOR STORAGE

Then I am going to have to draw little pictures in crayon for my non-readers.

"Oh, look Flower, Mommy mad that in RED crayon. She must really mean it this time."

~H