My husband and I "mow the lawn" occasionally at our house. In the event that we need to keep the subject matter PG, this is terminology we can use without the kids being any the wiser....or other peoples kids if in mixed company.
Not that we talk about mowing the lawn often or with people we don't or do know. We're not perverts. Just every now and then, especially with close friends (mostly my close friends and I talking alone) the subject comes up.
So at our house it's "mowing the lawn". If you're not following, I'm not talking about grass or any outdoor activity (although some people, somewhere, probably do consider this an outdoor activity). When I talk of the "fruits" of our gardening.....I don't mean flowers, even though we call one of our children Flower. I mean kids. You get it now.
So, my husband and I decided to mow the lawn. The babies were asleep in our bed, and the big kid was downstairs playing video games. We settled on the babies room. It was empty and convenient.
We learned a few things:
1) We are not as young as we once were.
2) Carpet sucks.
3) We really like the cushioning of our bed.
We also learned why we hate toys that talk. Case in point.
My husband's mother bought this for our Flower for her first Christmas. We were going to throw it out, but we kept it around. She never played with it. It's been almost 3 years.
My Lovey really likes this toy. It says things like, "Green Hand." "Blue Ear." See the picture? You get it. It says it's body parts when you press them. When it's in the "music" mode it plays songs, etc.
When you press it's tummy it says, "Tummy".
So, we're mowing the lawn. On the HARD floor, which really hurts. Trying really hard to be real quiet. Out of nowhere, the little dog says, "Yellow Foot."
I laugh. My husband laughs. We continue.
No one touches the toy. A few minutes later......
Out. Of. Nowhere.
"You're my friend!"
Now let me tell you, I was almost in tears at this point, I was laughing so hard. I also noticed that my lower back was screaming at me to get up.
Still, must go on.
Out of nowhere, the lawn mower stops. I didn't even hear anything and I gave my husband what I'm sure was a "wtf are you doing???" kind of look when again an interruption occurred.
He says, "Yes?"
Wobbs says, "Are you guys in there?"
I think, "Here's your sign."
Hubby says, "Yes."
Wobbs - "Are you OK?"
No dude. We're not ok. Go away.
Hubby says, "Go watch a movie."
Wobbs - "Ok. Just checking on you."