Personal Growth

My husband brought home a rubbermaid tub/bin of clothes yesterday from our old house (on the market, but not sold). The clothes inside were mostly mine. They were from many years ago, like when we were first married.

Lots has changed since then.

In the "growth" department I would say, "Yes. I have grown." Physically for "sho". Seriously. Who can wear a size 31x32 pair of jeans after 3 kids?! (If you can, just shut up.) Camp shorts in a size 8. 8!! And shirts in the mediums galore. I don't think I can even put one boob in a medium now. ;)

Watching the kids look at the clothes was fun too. Phrases like, "Mom, why would anyone ever wear leather pants!?" abounded. They were followed closely by, "Hey! I can wear that!" We did give quite a few of the items to the children. Of course, I had to torment myself (really, it was to make everyone laugh, myself included) and attempt to try some of the items on. Be glad we didn't take pictures or you'd have a wet tushy from peeing your pants.

But in the real area of personal growth, I can see that as a moral human being, a Catholic, a Christian, a mom, a wife, and a woman, I have grown a lot.

It is amazing to me the kind of things I found appropriate to wear, in public or private, once upon a time. We found some old tattoo shop shirts in the bin. These were free t-shirts the tattoo shop owner had screen-printed up with his shops logo and usually some kind of other thing on it. I wore them everywhere. He had a great ring of free advertising going on with these things. I would cut the sleeves off mine, cause I have sleeves of tattoos, and the tight t-shirt collar so they would be more comfortable and show off my ink to the fullest.

The two shirts in question were special shirts that were made up for a tattoo show (Yes, there are tattoo shows/conventions all over the place. There are also tattoo magazines, and the photographers usually come to the shows. There's contests, etc., artists, and lots of other stuff.) in the fall of 2005. The said the name of the tattoo shop and "Tattoo Party Crew" on them. They also had a "drawing" (not a photo) of a woman, with a tattoo, on them. Except,.....she was standing, facing away from the viewer, wearing only a pair of thong underwear and high heels. She had a tattoo over her lower back.

Now, I'm not a prude by any means. But this certainly falls into the "inappropriate for my 9 year old son to be staring at" category any day of the week, especially yesterday. My husband had the slight of hand to pull it away before any of the kids saw it. Of course, I'm sure they saw plenty of it in 2005, since they were all around then and I wore it ALL THE TIME.

I guess I am just happy that I can see that shirt for what it really is - a distraction. It's another one of those things out there to distract us from what's really important and to desensitize us to immorality. I know, I know......maybe I'm making a big deal about this. "It's just a shirt." Right? Well, no. It's a lifestyle that I am proud to say I don't buy into any more. I don't think it's ok to walk around with a half-naked chick on my chest (like anyone needs more help seeing where that is). I also don't think it's ok to desensitize my children to nudity/pornography at every turn. Seeing me, their mother, go from the bathroom to the bedroom with no towel is a far cry from seeing a chick who looks like she works on a pole, if you catch my drift.

My point here is, I feel I have experienced some personal growth in the past four years, and I am grateful. It's wonderful to realize that it's ok to change and it's ok to let the past be. I don't have to mourn the life I had before but can look to it as a place where I have been and grown from. Feels good.

Oh, and we crumpled up the shirts and threw them away. Somethings are not even appropriate to give away.