Monday, February 9, 2009

If H is for Huge, What is 42 for?

I finally did it.

I got a bra. That. Fits.

(2 actually)

My adventures in nursing never cease to surprise me. I never thought I would see the day when I seriously could consider my bras to be parachutes, or at the very least large enough to slow down a small vehicle if opened behind.

When I first started pregnancy, child numero uno, I was what I then considered (ha! ha!) a large cup size - D. Of course, when you are a young, skinny teenager weighing 125 lbs. (ha! ha! again, can you even imagine?!), a D cup is reasonably large especially on my small Puerto Rican frame. I cannot tell you how horrified unsettling it was when I reached an F while nursing my first child. For all of you none savvy bra wearers out there - an A is 1 inch of breast bigger than your rib cage, a B 2, a C 3, and so on. An F is 6. Yep.

And then I was not nursing and after about 2 years I settled into a DD. Not so bad. Not available at every store, but not impossible to find either. Back pain on a scale of 1-10....7 or 8. Livable. Clothes shopping....achievable. Average bra price....$30-45. Can do.

Child number 2. Got up to the F early, before birth. Nursed this child as an H cup. 34 H. You know what happens when you're that size? You have to special order bras from Europe. This is because our country thinks that if you're a 34 you must only have a B or C cup and if you have an H cup you don't exist (because no American bra manufacturer makes them). Hmmm. Let's compare. Not available at ANY store. Back pain on a scale of 1-10....12. Excrutiating pain by midday. Check. Clothes shopping.....futile. Average bra price.....$60-75 plus international shipping. Ugh.

Unfortunately, I was still nursing in the H cup when I became pregnant with child numero tres. That means there was no shrinking inbetween. I also gained weight without the advantge of having a break from nursing to lose it. The result is this:

I went to the specialty bra shop where a nice little old lady works. The kind of bra lady who looks at you and instantly knows the right size. She took one look at me in my too-small, no support nursing tank/camisole thing and ran off. She came back with a bra in size 42.

Four. Two.


I asked her if she really thought that was necessary. I used to be a 34. I'm sure I've gained weight but I was delusional thinking maybe a 36 or 38. 42? She said, "Well, we can measure if you like?"

She got out the tape measure and proceeded to check me. "Yep. 41 1/2, just like I thought. You want to try this on now, Hon?"

Umm, let me take my foot out of my mouth first, then yeah.

F-O-U-R-T-Y T-W-O.

I will not be divulging my actual cup size at this point as I am still trying to process this and I don't want to send any of you into shock. Most of you probably think this is a little too much information anyway. Sorry. ;)



Anonymous said...

I thought this little clip would help with the angst of gargantuan breastfeeding breasts. (Been There. Done That.)

You probably have to copy and paste, but it works, I checked.


Aubrey said...

It's not too much information. It made me laugh!

I finally got measured at Victoria's Secret and have been (one at a time) buying "real" bras. They fit so well; it feels like I'm wearing nothing. Of course, I'm waaaay back in a D cup, so my back isn't as tired as yours. ;) Also, I'm not nursing right now, which helps keep the size and weight down!

Good luck!