Baptism

Rose was baptised this weekend. Here are some pictures for those of you who live far away.

Unlike my other children, she didn't mind the water a bit.

There is her Godmother.

On the left, GodMother and Godfather (in the green and grey), on the right, myself and the husband (pink and green), and in the middle, Fr. Holmes.

Isn't she cute!

Random Sunday (Except that it's really Monday)

~~First up, some cute pictures I can't help but share.

Love this one too. Oops! That is not exactly the one I wanted to load. Oh, well. Still nice one of the girl. He was brushing her hair. Cute.

~~I did it again. I started another project. See? Look down.

I am making longies out of that yarn. I know. I have no will power.

I did, however, finish the hat in just one day. And, I even worked a bunch of rows on the shawl. Really.

~~I hate knitting lace. I will finish it. But not start another one, probably ever.

~~I am still not sleeping well. I have been taking the iron supplement. My midwife says I probably won't notice a difference for a few weeks. I also finally found a chiropractor who takes our insurance (yes!) and is wonderful, and not too far away (only 1/2 hour). I can't wait to go see him again this week.

~~What ever happened to midwifery?? Am I still in "school"? Do I still study? Attend births?

Yes, I am still in school, technically. I go to a school that allows you to work at your own pace, therefore allowing "breaks". This pregnancy has been a big break, and not one I was expecting. All of my classroom/academic stuff is done already. I simply have clinicals to finish. I was about 50% done with those when I became pregnant (this time around....I also started out school when I was pregnant last time).

The midwife I work with is super understanding about me not being able to handle anything more than Just This Pregnancy. It helps that she is also my midwife. I plan to start seeing patients with her again once the baby is somewhere between 3-6 months old. We see patients 1-2 days a week for prenatals and I can bring my baby with. I can start getting the rest of my birth assists and primaries once my daughter is maybe 6-9 months old.....or older. We'll see what kind of baby I have. They are all different, and I am really not into leaving my baby. It depends on how far along labors are, if it's a first, second, or more baby for a mama, etc. Lots of factors go into me being able to go to a birth.

I will say I truly miss the work. I have been reading my textbooks late at night when I can't sleep. Dorky, I know. But I LOVE this stuff. I also started reading my favorite midwifery book of all time the other night, "Baby Catcher" by Peggy Vincent. I got this book before I became pregnant with my second child. It made me seek out a midwife for my next pregnancy/birth and cemented my desire to become a midwife. Reading it now really makes me miss attending births.....but I just can't. And I know there will be plenty of time for that later.

~~My husband's birthday was yesterday (ok, 2 days ago, as I write this Sunday night, but really it's 1 am Monday morning). We took the kids out to dinner at a super fancy smancy restaurant where the dinners are $35/plate. Chris and I have been there a few times in the past (read once or twice a year for the last few years). There is always sooooo much food that he and I ordered meals and just ordered salads for the kids (and 1 plate of french fries for the babies to share). We both split our meals with the kids and we still brought home leftovers. Our bill wasn't too high and the kids loved having such fancy food served to them. They thought the unending loaves of fresh baked bread that we had to cut ourselves was the best part.

~~I have a confession of sorts to make. Really, I just want to say something that isn't really bad, just bothering me.

I missed Mass about 6 weeks ago for no good reason at all. (I was tired and didn't feel like getting up, but I also didn't bother to go to a later Mass that day either.) I haven't missed any Masses except that one. But I also haven't managed to make it to Confession since I missed the Mass. This, of course, means I haven't received the Eucharist since then either. It really sucks to sit at Mass and NOT be able to go up and receive our Lord. Sucks big time. Especially when my husband keeps asking me why I am not going up. I keep telling him. He just thinks I am being stubborn. But I know that it is a grave sin to miss Mass and that I am not to receive Holy Communion until I go to Confession.

The problem is not that I don't want to go to Confession. It's that Confession is only on Saturdays. I never think about going until Sunday morning. I wish we lived in a time when there were enough priests that there was Confession before (and sometimes during) every Mass. That would be really awesome. I would probably go every single time I went to Mass, even if it was a weekday Mass.

What I probably need to do is simply get there early on Sunday and ask our priest if he would have time for a confession after Mass. Usually they are pretty accommodating when someone wants a confessor.

That's all I have for now. I hope you had a wonderful weekend.

I Have A Blog??

Surely you jest.

This cannot be my blog. Surely not - for there is emphasis on the my. We all know I cannot do that.

Oh, but wait. I am on actual internet. Internet that does not require me to *star* and CAPITALIZE things I want to accentuate.

I thank my dear friend, laurazim, for the use of her PC.

Now......for the important stuff.

I am hopefully going to update my sidebar as soon as I am done with this post. There are many a wonderful, entertaining, informative blog I have added to my bookmarks on the crackberry that I would like to add here.

An update was requested, I believe by fellow blogger linked above in a comment on my last post.

~~Rural living is very special.

• My gas and electric bill are now separate
• In fact, I have to order the gas, AND it's propane
• The people who work at the propane place are rather dense
• I have a septic system requiring me to call and have our waste pumped away
• Weird
• Garbage must be driven in to "town" on Saturdays, they do not pick it up
• $2 per bag! But "recycle" is free
• We are now recycling for the first time ever
• When the wind blows and you live in the middle of nowhere.....will anyone hear you scream?
• It's nice when you have a cop on hand to escort you into the house in the middle of the night with his 9mm when there are rabid horses stalking you from the neighboring field
• Wind storms can knock the electricity out for hours at a time in the middle of the night
• Not so great when your husband needs electricity to run his CPAP machine so he can rest

Other than that all is well.

Ok, maybe not.

~~A devastating tragedy has afflicted our family over the last few months. One of my step-daughters has been the victim of a sexual assault. It has waged a spiritual battle in our family. Not only has it caused much stress for her, but my husband is beside himself with grief, guilt, and sadness.

Trying to deal with the consequences of the circumstances has caused even more hardship in our family. We are fighting tooth and nail to gain primary physical placement of our daughter. Her mother obviously opposes this. We have shared placement of both the girls equally for 7 years. However, with the assault having taken place in the township (less than 3000 people) where her mother lives, and under her mother's care, we have decided she would be physically and emotionally safer under or care and OUT of that school district.

The hardship of having to travel back and forth to the courthouse and lawyer's office with my babies in the car has begun to drive me to the brink of insanity. Not to mention the constant vigil answering the phone calls between the police, lawyer, social workers, counselor, school officials, and her mother. I can't even stand it.

Unfortunately for our daughter, her mother doesn't really see the "problem". Some comments we have gotten from her (and I am not exaggerating or joking here):

"We should just put her on birth control."

"I don't know why you feel so sorry for [her], she wanted this to happen."

"No one will talk about it. They'll be over it soon."

"If you tell the cops it will just cause everyone a lot more trauma."

"Kids will be kids."

Seriously. She's 13. The "offender", as the District Attorney is calling him, is 18. Yep. And her mother sees no problem. Didn't want us to go to the police. Obviously, getting a predator off the streets would be the last thing on our mind. Yeah, especially since my husband, her father, is a COP. That is the last thing we'd do. Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.

Oh, and the fact that we weren't told about it as soon as she (the mother) found out - that doesn't bother us at all. No really, it's totally fine for you to wait 10 days to tell us. And then only tell us because our daughter was "supposed to tell" us, but didn't. Of course you should leave it up to a 13 year old victim of a crime to inform her father of the crime. You shouldn't bother picking up the phone, being the adult, and telling him yourself. Nope. You acted like a completely competent, normal, sane parent.

Oh wait. There's more. When he confessed, which he did do after we took our daughter to the police to tell her story, he also confessed to doing this to no less than 3 other girls. Three. Other. Girls. Age of consent in the state I reside in is 16. This miscreant, this fiend, wasn't in a relationship with any of these girls. Not that status would make the act of his addiction OK - but it would explain more. This creep was preying on young girls that were friends of his little sister. Genius. Or scary. Take your pick.

There are more details than I care to recall. And anyway, this is not the appropriate medium for those details. If you know me, ask me sometime about how eye opening it was to read the police report. I still have not shared it with my husband. He knows we have it, but feels it prudent not to lay his eyes upon it.

This is the real reason I haven't blogged much. Well, that and the stubbornness on my part to take the time to blog from my blackberry.

Anything else (other than my very long rant)?

~~Oh yes. I have been knitting - a sweater and a pair of socks. The former for my husband. The latter for the Boy. Did you know that when you are knitting a circumference of 59" a skein of yarn only makes 4" of height? So even though I've been knitting my butt off, the sweater remains a mere 7" in depth. It will be at least 20" to the armpits, then there are two sleeves, and the yoke/shoulders. I only have 7 skeins of yarn. I'm going to need more yarn. That translates to, "I get to visit the knitting store again soon!" Woot-woot for me!

The socks will probably be done first. :P

~~Flower is the cutest 3 year old ever. She says super cute things and does super cute things.

She is constantly putting all her "babies" to sleep all over the house. She covers them with whatever is handy: a washcloth, a baby wipe, a clean pair of underwear from the laundry basket. You know, whatever looks like a blanket. Her "babies" can also be whatever's handy: a remote, a hairbrush, her "duke", a shoe.

When she wants to be picked up she says, "I want to pick YOU uppie." I ask, "You want to pick ME uppie?" "Yesh," is her answer. Really.

~~Lovey can walk. And run. He has an opinion. He is sick of his sister beating him up. He has a love for steps and a fear for NOTHING. He has a set of curls across the nape of his neck that I could just eat up.

~~If you do not care to hear of fertility issues GO TO THE NEXT SECTION.

I am fertile again. How do I know this? I got my period. For. Ten. Days. 10. T-E-N. It was looooong.

It wasn't that unpleasant, just never ending.

I had to wash pads 4 times.

Yes, I use cloth menstrual pads. No, it's not gross. Yes, I wash them in my washing machine where all my other laundry is done. No, it doesn't bother me. I've used cloth diapers extensively. They feel better against my skin. They are pretty and soft. They make me feel happy and lovely at a time when most likely I would be feeling icky and run down. Organic bamboo velour - look it up.

~~I have been asked (and I may have said something about this already, so forgive me) to be the Confirmation Sponsor for a dear friend's daughter! It was the daughter's Guardian Angel (she tells me) that thought of me. I guess I never expected that I would ever be considered for such an honor as a Sponsor or a Godparent, etc., being that I am myself a new convert.

It's very cool. I am a little nervous as to my exact role and what things I should be doing for her. For now, I pray. I know I can do that. My sponsor was really awesome about answering questions about the Faith, bringing me little presents at important ceremonies throughout the year leading up to my confirmation, sending me cards here and there in the mail with inspirational messages, etc. I hope I can live up to the call.

~~Lawyers are EXPENSIVE. Really. I wish I could charge $200/hour on the phone and $300/hour in person. Although he is very good. But it would be awful expensive for my children to have a mother if I charged those kind of rates. Can you imagine - "Mom, can I ask you a question?" "I don't know, you got 10 bucks?"

~~Cops don't make a lot of money. It's been a year at this cop's salary and we have finally exhausted our savings. It's down to $5. We are praying for a miracle.

~~I am very much looking forward to Mass tomorrow. All Saint's Day beats out Halloween any day in my book.

That "Almost Baptized" Feeling

Hee hee!! Haw-haw!!



~H

Baptism

Isn't it beautiful? This is truly my first experience with a "regular" baptism happening in my (yes, my) family. My other two children were baptized at the Easter Vigil in 2008, during the Liturgy.

My Lovey's baptism was a little more personal and quite lovely. Not that I minded the baptism of my other children in front of the whole parish (and then some). It was just really nice to be able to celebrate and rejoice with a small group.

Lovey's Godparents are wonderful! Won. Der. Ful. I love them. He is quite a lucky fellow. I know that he will be receiving prayers and spiritual guidance for years to come.

We had a cozy get-together at their house afterward (I may have already mentioned this, forgive me).....which we stayed at until the wee hours of morning.

Enjoy the pictures!

~H

Et Tu?

Yeah. I've been busy.

For all of you who keep checking in, I thank you. I'll get back on track here soon. (Is this a repeating pattern?)

Let's see......

Christmas. Check.

I actually got my mother to bring the presents over BEFORE Christmas so that my kids could open them when they woke up. My mother usually insists on being present for the present opening, which makes it very difficult. Last year she held their presents hostage until like Feb./March. It was nuts.

We had a smaller Christmas, present-wise, than normal, and I'm happy about that. Midnight Mass is my absolute (almost) favorite Mass of the year.

Diaper Addiction. Check.

I LOVE WOOL. Love it! I have switched to knit wool covers/longies (pants)/shorties (duh, shorts) instead of PUL diaper covers. I love them. I also have a problem. If you are reading this and you sell wool - DO NOT SELL TO ME! (unless it's really, really cute)

Friends with Crazy Parenting. Check.

I'm not going to comment too much on this one. I myself, have been accused of crazy parenting. (Yes, C., she will sleep in her own bed one day). I don't want to point fingers or call names. I'm just going to sit on my soap box and say this - Don't mess with God's plan. He has a good plan. He designed us this way for a reason. There. Much better. If you'd like your own soap box, blogger is free.

New School Room. Check.

I've decided to create a "school room" in my home. I finally won the debate about kids sharing bedrooms in my house (I love you, honey!) and have been able to combine the children and make a space for school. My dear friend C. came and spent an entire day here helping me move furniture up and down stairs, vacuuming, and cleaning. YOU ROCK.

Family Closet. In progress.

And the family closet idea I had about a year ago is probably going to happen soon too! Woo-hoo!

Spirituality. Check.

Working on my faith journey, I know, will be a never ending process. For now, I am trying really hard to just pray for 5 minutes a day. I know I do well to always serve Him by meeting the needs of my children (He has a PLAN! Stick to the PLAN!) but I do strive for something more. That something more may simply be that once my kids are grown I can be one of the little old ladies who show up early and stay late at Mass to pray the Rosary.

My husband and I also had a wonderful meeting with our friend, Fr. E. He gave us some very basic instructions to growing closer to God in our marriage. We are very excited to implement his suggestions into our lives. We also are looking forward to having our marriage convalidated.

Baptism. Check.

The Baptism of My Lovey was beautiful! As soon as I get pictures (I forgot my camera!!!, but everybody else brought one and they're going to email them to me) I will put some up. The ceremony was beautiful. My son's Godparents are WONDERFUL. And my friends are AWESOME. I love all of you!

And, in an weird kind of ironic thing (meant to be, of course), My Lovey was baptized on the Feast of the Epiphany, which, this year, is also my deceased father's birthday. I found out, after he died and during my conversion, that his ENTIRE FAMILY was/is Catholic. Things that make you go hmmmm.

Reality. Check?

And now, back to the real world. Bills pile up, laundry piles up, dishes pile up. Snow is piled up. Too bad I can't find some motivation piled up somewhere around here.

Happy New Year. God Bless everyone! Have you requested your Patron Saint of the Year for 2009? If not, you should!! I am. (Got the idea from Heather over at "A Catholic Mom in Sweden")

~H

Too Busy

I have been too busy to write anything. He's a (really) quick look at what we've been up to:

Right now, I am up with the Wobs running a hot steam shower to get rid of his croupy cough. He sounds like a baby harp seal.

My husband has been working like he's the only sheriff in town. People are breaking the law left and right my friends.

I am soooo tired because I cannot sleep when the seasons change and it is officially winter here, snow and all. My hubby's had the snow blower out 2 times already.

Black Friday appauls me. Really. I am happy the Lord has really helped me to fight the consumerism I was raised to worship.

But......I am getting addicted to cloth diaper hunting again. My Lovey is outgrowing the size he's in and I've got to get new (used) ones. I found a forum where I can trade for dipes instead of buying them. I'm trying to trade some of my Mama Cloth (yes, I use cloth menstrual pads. They are the BEST!!!).

Or.....I can try and use the potty, like I did with My Petite Flower. The diapers are just easier, what with having a toddler and baby.

My marriage needs time. We are so busy, some days I have to remind myself to say "I love you." (I do Sweetie, love you that is. I'm sorry we're so busy. And thank you for the cards.)

Advent has started. I got my Jesse Tree out today and my Advent Wreath. Only 1 day late! A new record for me.

I've been reading up more on the Culture of Death and Abortion. I've got some good ones coming.

Couponing has been OK. But I save lots of money by just going to the right store.

Penciled in a time for Baptism. Now I just have to confirm with all involved parties.

I'm at least thinking about St. Nicholas Day. I don't know if we'll do anything.

God Bless you all!!! More to come soon......

~H

On Family and Baptism

As a new Catholic, and a "new" mother once again, it is time for Baptism. My son needs to be brought into the Church and receive his citizenship in the Kingdom of God. As a parent it is my duty to arrange this matter, choosing God-parents who will be united to our family and child for eternity. The process is close to complete now that my boy is 3 months old (already! 3 months!).

The Sacrament of Baptism is one that should be relatively easy to set up, or so one would think. Other parents I know have had God-parents chosen for their children by the middle of pregnancy, at the latest, and it seems we are the last Catholics on the block to do so. I have had a very difficult time trying to figure out who I can ask. I have very important people in my life, but not very many that are Catholic, which of course is a requirement of aforementioned needed God-parents. Why is this so easy for everyone and not for me?

Some background maybe?

My family of origin was not what I would call Christian, at least not what I now believe to be a Christian. Not that we didn't believe in God or Jesus Christ. We did what I saw many of my fellow Americans doing - we went to church on Sundays to warm the benches and then lived the remaining 167 hours of the week as if we believed there was no God or at least that we had no knowledge that there could be one.

I was baptised and have God-parents, my Aunt and Uncle, whom I love and adore to this day. But I feel like my baptism was more of a "gotta do it b/c everybody does this when they have a baby and it's the right thing to do people, we don't want to seem like we can't keep up with the Jones, what will people say" reason rather than being the joyous celebration of God's Love that it should be. My brother, born 16 months after me, was never baptised. Guess life was just to busy for another meaningless celebration.

And that, friends, was what Church and God were to my family of origin. Meaningless. We never prayed. We never talked about God. We had this big white bible sitting on an end table in our living room that someone had given my parents for their wedding. It had some pictures in the middle of it. Now I know those "pictures" were actually prints of some of the wonderful Christian artwork to come out of the last 2,000 years. From those pictures, because of course I couldn't read yet, I gained my own idea of who God was and how it all worked. (More on that later.)

My baptism never really signified anything to my parents and therefore they never transferred any great significance of it to me. My God-parents certainly are important to me, but it's because they're my Aunt and Uncle, not so much the God part. That part was never really talked about, nor made important. Twenty-plus years later I find myself having my 2 children baptized, myself being confirmed a Catholic and receiving my First Holy Communion. It was beautiful and I chose for my childrens' God-parents a couple who was very instrumental in planting all the seeds for my conversion.

Here I am now, a Catholic as God intended, with another baby. And. No. Catholic. "Family". Save aforementioned older childrens' God-parents.

How do you choose God-parents? Who is appropriate? My biggest issue was feeling like I didn't know anyone "well" enough to ask them to be united with our family. Do I just ask someone we know from Church? Do I ask someone in our homeschool group? What about my dearest friend who is, unfortunately, not Catholic? How do I include her in something as important as this? Coming from about as far not Catholic as I did growing up I felt so uncomfortable asking anyone to step into this part of our life. I didn't want to make anyone feel obligated, and in my heart I knew that it should mean more to me than it felt like it was meaning.

So what did I do? What any other good Catholic would do - I prayed about it. I prayed a whole lot. I prayed towards the end of my pregnancy and a LOT MORE after My Lovey was born.

Finally, I just asked God to show me who was supposed to be his God-parents. Shortly after I asked that, a very important person who I was growing in friendship with, who is also a homeschooling mom, who also has many (7) kids, who also attends our parish, and whom I greatly respect asked me, "Have you had that baby baptized yet?" "No," I replied. "Oh, good! I thought I missed it. I don't want to miss seeing *******'s baptism!"

Could He have been a little more obvious?

So, after trying to catch this wonderful couple (my friend and her husband) at Mass for 4 weeks, I finally got the chance to ask her at our last MNO (Mother's Night Out). So nervous I was. Is this really OK? Maybe I shouldn't? Will she think it's out of line for me to ask her? I haven't known them that long. I had no reason to worry. She, of course, said yes and she'd, we'll they'd, be honored. Just like God planned. Yes!!! I am so happy. It wasn't too hard to ask, and I am so grateful to have this wonderful family be a part of our lives.

Now to plan the actual ceremony.............

~H